"Petals & Pettiness." Shocked? You shouldn't be.

Congratulations on finding a floral tee that wasn't designed for someone who thinks sunflowers in a mason jar counts as a centerpiece. The apricot and cream blooms on this shirt were chosen by someone who actually knows flowers, which means they were chosen with the kind of quiet judgment you absolutely cannot detect unless you also know flowers. You're welcome or you're warned, depending.

Slim fit. Longer body. Cotton so soft it makes your other tees look like they stopped trying, which they did. It layers under a cardigan, pairs with high-waisted jeans, works for approximately every low-effort situation that still requires you to look like you thought about it. Which is all of them. All situations are that situation.

This is the shirt for the person who has opinions about foliage. Who has at some point physically recoiled at a bouquet. Who understands that baby's breath is not a garnish, it's a cry for help, and has been gently, privately judging people about it for years. You don't have to say anything. The shirt says enough.

Product Features

• 100% combed ringspun cotton. Soft. You'll notice immediately and say nothing because that's your thing
• Slim fit, longer body. You have a torso. This accounts for it
• 4.2 oz/yd². Lightweight, breathable, completely unbothered by your schedule
• Reinforced side seams, shoulder tape, ribbed collar. Built to hold its shape unlike the floral arrangements at your last family event
• Tear-away label. Because the tag was the only part that wasn't working
• Runs small. Size up. This is not a negotiation

Care Instructions

Machine wash warm. Non-chlorine bleach only if something went very wrong. Tumble dry low. Iron or steam on medium if you're the type, and you probably are. Do not dry clean. It's cotton with a point of view, not a gown. Treat it well because it deserves that, not because it's fragile.